Sunday, February 26, 2006

Listen to THIS, MotherBITCH...and MTVChi-WTF?!



Wow. I mean. Wow.

From what I could glean about Notorious MSG is that they're like Beastie Boys meets Long Duk Dong. On the surface they seem so GODDAMN OFFENSIVE, but if you look closer, like at their interesting interview with Gothamist.com it seems like they are fighting for Asian American issues that need to get more exposure. Sure, it's delivered as a joke, but underneath that joke a lot of issues like Chinese Food Delivery Fatalities and the fact that we don't drive motherfuckin' rickshaws as well as the,erm..apparent virility of the "Chinese Egg Roll" gets through to a more mainstream audience.

Plus, they're funny. Anyone who says their music "doesn't just get in your ears, it gets in your butt hole and VIBRATES" deserves a listen, right?!

On a side note. Mtv apparently launched a separate music channel for Chinese American Music. It's called..wait for it...MTVChi When did this happen?!

Personally, I have to wonder how effective minority interest entertainment channels like Logo, WE, Lifetime, BET, MTVChi are.
Sure the "gesture" that they're out there seems like the entertainment business is doing "something" to address us. But frankly, I have to wonder if by making these channels, big channels like MTV are only further avoiding responsibility of diversifying their own content. Like, if I have to watch the SAME GODDAMN Ashlee Simpson video on MTV and see the ZILLIONTH repeat of an MTV Cribs episode, what excuse is there to not put some Notorious MSG and MC Jin up there with it?

Also, as a Chinese American woman (yikes, I actually went there! ha!), I am not apt to go right to WE, O, Lifetime, MTVChi etc..for my programs. For example, I didn't find Notorious MSG off of MTVChi. I came across their interview with gothamist.com. Through Notorious MSG, that was how I even knew MTVChi EXISTED. Hey, isn't it supposed to work backwards? And isn't it strange that in TAIWAN I'm the first of my Asian American friends to hear about BOTH Notorious MSG AND MTVChi?

The only thing I think can redeem a channel like MTVChi is if they put on some original programming that attracts a general wide interest. Kinda what Queer Eye did for Bravo. Otherwise they're stuck with an "urban ghetto" status that will make it really hard for them to make any real impact.

www.notoriousmsg.com Apparently these boys will "sexually assualt your ears for free" in various shows around the States. Most recently my old digs, NYC. If anyone catches a show, let me know if they're good.

Monday, February 20, 2006

Helen Gets All Pissy Homesick This Week and Finds Something That Spells it ALL OUT WHY

Asian American Empowerment: ModelMinority.com - Postcard from Taiwan

This guy totally goes off on a rant explaining why he can't fit in Taiwan, even though he is Taiwanese American.

I agree with some of the things he says.

Not everything he says is true for everyone I have met. Luckily, I know a lot of people from Taiwan who do not fit his complaints (and you guys have helped me not fly out of here screaming)....but once again, this reflects why I fit better in NYC than I ever will here.

My roots just dont take to the soil here.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Nothing Asian..JUST FUNNY!



The Awful Forums - How to make Garfield funny....remove his thought balloons

Funniest thing I've seen in a while.

I used to LOVE reading Garfield comics. I thought they were funniest things on Earth. But then they kind of got too..trite for me?

Repurposing a childhood love for my modern day sensibilities...lovin' it.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Transformers...Asians in DISGUISE!


I went to a party this weekend at the BEST apartment I'd seen in Taipei.There were some really cool people there and I had a great time chilling in a HOUSE without stupid cover charges and cigarette smoke.

I didn't really talk at first when I got there, because I was feeling a little shy, so noone really talked to me either. I didn't think so much about it, until someone asked me where I was from.

"I'm from New Jersey."

All of a sudden I became a fascinating creature.

Everyone was infinitely tickled by that. Even further more when I said I was most recently from Brooklyn.

Then it dawned on me..."Oooh...they thought I was a local chica!"

To some of the foreigners who aren't Asian ethnically, I think it must be such a head trip when I start rambling in perfect English. English bred by NJ Valley Girl Mall Culture nonetheless. And to the others I guess they're just like, "Oh, cool. She's American. That explains the decent hair and lack of pastel in her wardrobe."

Ugh. I hated that. Yea, I can understand where the mistake lies. If anything, I have to remind myself to be more outgoing than I usually am to compensate for the fact I DON'T look American anymore. It definitely beats being ignored by a group of people from your country because they assume you don't speak the language or are an uninteresting local in their eyes. But it sucks that it has to be that way. But each time I do open my mouth, well, I hope everyone will remember those Asians back home who were actually cool and could speak perfect English. Yea...hey, we're in Taiwan too you know.

Either way, no matter where I go. If I drop my English bomb among locals or other Americans...I guess I stick out a bit more no matter what. Hahaha...maybe that's why I like to hang out with my friends who are crazier or as crazy as me.
There is something to be said about strength in numbers.

But seriously, this is why I blend in better in America than I do here. And why I don't think I'll ever feel 100% at home in Asia.

I think next time I go to a party where the majority of people are Non-Asian Foreigners, I'll pull a move like the Korean chick in Lost and PRETEND not to speak English, and then suddenly SHOCK N'AWE the crap out of everyone by dropping an English Bomb laced with profanities in the middle of the party.

No wait. I wouldn't be able to stand not being able to be myself: THE JERSEY GIRL.

BON JOVI RAWKS!!!! SHOT THROUGH THE HEART! AND YOU'RE TO BLAAAME. YOU GIVE LOOOOOVE.....A BAD-NAME.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Say My Name, Say My Name...

"Distinguished Bright Luminous Moral Relationship and Order"

I looked up the meaning of my Chinese name using the Yahoo Chinese-English Dictionary.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAAA!

I sound like the Bhuddist Goddess of the Hearth. Watch out homewreckers, harlots and immoral coveters of neighbors' wives.
There's a new Sheriff in Town. Someone's got to keep our relationships moral and in order.

But you don't have to call me that or anything. Keep it simple.

I'll also answer to "Super Sparkly Nun".

Same diff, right????